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FINALLY: Axe Makes a Body Spray For Ladies (Barf)


O joy, ’tis a happy Monday indeed! For now we can eagerly anticipate a new step in gender equality thanks to Axe Body Spray, who has introduced Anarchy — a Spray for Ladies! And there is an ad! Gosh, I wonder if it’s going to feature a homely woman being pawed by a gaggle of sexy, sexy menfolk, just like in the corresponding ads for the boys … Oh, no, wait. She is already hot. And taking her clothes off. In the midst of a police chase and a traffic accident. Yup. Okay, never mind then. Axe remains 100 percent a men’s brand.

We see what they tried to do here. And it failed. First of all, no woman in her right mind would wear anything by Axe. Unless that woman longs to smell like drunken, oily, bridge ‘n’ tunnel trash. (Ed. note: The author is bridge ‘n’ tunnel trash, imbibes on occasion, and relies on blotting papers throughout the day.) Seriously, even anyone on a Wal-Mart budget knows that the best one can hope for in a scented product by Axe is shades of Designer Imposters Fake Eternity by Malvin Glein. So, already, Axe is losing this battle.

But where they have proven that they still don’t understand how to market things to women in a way that will make them feel actually strong and feminine is by making a commercial for a women’s product for men.

Here is the ad:

Now, aside from the clear conflict of interest, it’s not that bad of an ad. Unless you consider what Axe’s ads for men look like:

Yup. That’s a homeless guy. A homeless guy who was just dumpster diving. Who put on Axe Body Spray that he found in a dumpster. And now a hot lady is going to screw him silly. She’s going to screw a homeless guy. But in case you were still unclear about who is expected to be “hot” in Axe ads, I give you this: the Great Undie Run Challenge of 2010.

Lesson learned: Axe makes unattractive/schlubby/actually perfectly normal looking guys who are just below Hollywood’s ridiculous standards attractive. Ladies: better start out hot to begin with, or there’s nothing we can do for you. Axe Anarchy is going to smell so bad that exterior hotness is still required to attract a mate.

(via Jezebel)

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  • http://twitter.com/Super_Widget Joanna

    Lol.  American ads are so silly.

  • Anonymous

    I actually think I know some women who would wear Axe Anarchy..  Or would have, five years ago when I was in high school.

  • Anonymous

    “…
    making a commercial for a women’s product for men.”
    Exactly what’s so offensive. It’s the fact that the ad is not the flip side of the original Axe commercials, because having an average looking woman or sexy looking guys is forbidden for some (self-serving) reason. This whole thing, I predict, will be an epic sexist fail, or at least a huge double-standard. It’s already half way there.

  • Adam R. Charpentier

    This ad would have been satisfying if they had immediately begun to either a) sniff and then lick each other’s faces in overly animalistic fashions, or b) they had sprayed each other in the goddamn face with Axe.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_IGRK4BKTKC5RGO56RXTUEVFJSM ainok

    Meh. I was so, so hoping for lots of naked dudes falling from the sky. Pfft.

  • Anonymous

    So, honest question.

    So the gender reversed AXE commercial is where an average woman puts on some Axe and then is endlessly pursued by super attractive men,

    How does this not end up looking like she’s going to be gang raped?

  • Anonymous

    There are ways: instead of chasing, they could be offering flowers and chocolates, dancing with her, etc. Yeah, it’s stereotypical, but then all these ads are.

  • Anonymous

    Honestly, I would prefer the Axe (Lynx in the UK) adverts would just die.  The whole “unattractive? then spray some pheremones and the preferred gender will come a-runnin!” meme is so patronising it offends me that they’ve gotten away with it for so long.

    I’m actually glad they didn’t go this route.  It’s bad enough men are made to look like fools who can only attract women with body spray: having a Hollywood Homely woman do the same just makes them look stupid too.

  • Anonymous

    True. In an ideal world, Axe would just plain not exist.

  • Anonymous

    I see what you mean. I hope the commercials emulate fantasy, not real fears of being chased, inappropriately touched, creepily oggled, etc. I think appropriate displays of attraction could be possible, though … surely those exist? 

    I think the key factor is to not make the ads about how sexy women will be when they use the product, but instead about how sexy those that they will attract will be.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_R7GVNIKWG3S2UTHEQOMSZXT4M4 Anna B

    THIS.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_R7GVNIKWG3S2UTHEQOMSZXT4M4 Anna B

    I don’t even know anyone who buys Axe. Everyone I know mentions Axe as the butt of perfume/cologne jokes. Even when I was in high school, boys and girls would horse around and joke about pouring Axe in expensive cologne bottles to fake it.

    Who the hell buys this product?

  • Life Lessons

    *RASPBERRY*

  • http://twitter.com/InfiniteMidlife CrisisOn∞Midlives

    Crap ads for a crap product.  Seriously, is everyone who works in product development at Axe olfactory-challenged?  All their stuff smells like Drakkar Noir and Deep Woods Off had a weaponized, migraine inducing baby.

  • Francesca M

    yup!

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_JE7NLHGFDERJUIYG54MVHDLGIE ML

    I actually found it offensive to female police officers.  And “Mayday” is the most rediculous thing I’ve ever heard over a police radio – and I spent a lot of time in dispatch when I was in high school.

  • https://www.Zutronic.com/ Zutronic

    Axe should stick to what it knows and continue to make body sprays for men. Not women.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Nika-Kalantar/100001282923942 Nika Kalantar

    To be fair the mag I read had an article by a lady about how she loves using Axe. She just loves smelling like a young dude and to be honest, why not? Any perfume can be misused, I have a wonderful perfume I love that I can’t wear too often, it’s too strong and doesn’t fit the occasion so I have to bide my time.
    Pretty sure the horrible ads are the thing we really hate Axe for.

    here’s the link to the Axe-loving lady
    http://www.xojane.com/beauty/axe-for-men

  • Anonymous

    I’m anosmic, so I don’t have an opinion on the smell. It’s the marketing and company attitude I would love to see zero of. Even that woman got into a fight because of the perception of the product enforced by their advertising. If the scent itself could exist without all that, it would be fine.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Nika-Kalantar/100001282923942 Nika Kalantar

    But we actually have those, perfume ads show women as more sexually attractive as they spray the unbearable amount of the stuff on and so do some soap ads.
    You know the kind: lady sits around half-naked, touches her skin a lot in a sensual way then has a bath or goes happy with the pulverizer and magically a well-groomed man in his mid-thirties appears, he is either also half-naked or has roses.
    The thing is, the ads play up the most basic of social gender-needs:
    *men feel that for once they don’t have to compete with a large group of males (or have found an easy way to be the chased instead of the chasers, something that is still not all that common in our culture)
    *women get the fairy-tale treatment, be pretty and feminine and a handsome prince will arrive
    Are these ads horrible? Yes. But saying that there isn’t a female version out there or “what were the creators thinking” is just being ill-informed

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Nika-Kalantar/100001282923942 Nika Kalantar

    I think I smelled it only a couple of times, it’s not that popular ’round these parts (or I just don’t socialize with the ‘right’ kind of crowd) :)

  • Adam Whitley

    What I really wanna know is what body spray has to do with libertarian socialism.

  • Matthew Lane

    Wow, i’ve never seen any of these commercials before, because we don’t have them in Australia. Are all American commercials that stupid & sexist?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Lisa-Wright/100001086169230 Lisa Wright

    Geezz….where have I been eh? Never seen those ads! Well they say sex sells, not so sure on that. So what they’re (I think) trying to say is> the fragrance makes you go stupid! Forget all your ethics & morals.

  • http://twitter.com/Saronai Saronai Doya

    A better commercial would have seen him stepping forward arm outstretched as though to kiss her, she steps forward as though to reciprocate then pounds him hard with a sucker punch, shoves to the ground, cuffs him, and loads him into the backup police car just pulling up.

    Maybe just for good measure the car is driven by her hot partner.  Incredibly weak that she moves forward to kiss him too.  So what, if we wear axe we’ll forget about being law enforcement officers and happily snog the first hot criminal who just ROBBED a place THUG.  Whatever.  I wanted to see her take him down, and not in a kinky way and shove him in the back of a police car with a big ole smirk on her face.

  • http://twitter.com/Saronai Saronai Doya

    For the record, I don’t mean my version would be a good commercial, necessarily.  I dislike all commercials by default, particularly ones that rely on (and further) stereotypes and stupidity, I’m just saying (in my humble opinion) my alternate ending is better :P

  • Anonymous

     What a hoe lol just cause he smelt good? really?

  • Anonymous

    I like to use mens axe nd body wash :D