Andrew Cedotal, Author at The Mary Sue

This Will Exist: Another Awful, Awful Mortal Kombat Movie is In the Works

<a rel="attachment wp-att-5939" href="https://www.themarysue.com/new-mortal-kombat-movie"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-5939" title="Screenshot-1" src="https://www.themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Screenshot-1-550x407.png" alt="" width="550" height="407" /></a> That's right -- Warner Bros. apparently thinks that Mortal Kombat, the legendarily sanguinary video game franchise, is valuable enough to warrant a follow-up to 1997's critically savaged feature film, Mortal Kombat: Annihilation. The series has indeed already spawned two movies, one medium-grade mid-90's moral panic, and an, um, "animated film" (see above), but another movie? Wasn't <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0891592/">Street Fighter: the Legend of Chun-Li</a> enough?

Feb 19, 2010

Civilization V is Coming! And the Map Finally Uses Hexagons!

<a rel="attachment wp-att-5878" href="https://www.themarysue.com/civilization-v-announced/"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-5878" title="screenshot_03-noscale" src="https://www.themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/screenshot_03-noscale2-550x305.jpg" alt="" width="550" height="305" /></a> In an announcement that is surprising no one, Firaxis has announced that Civilization V is under development. And while much is being made of the game's promised features -- including additional civilizations, leaders who speak in their native tongues, and long-range bombardment by units (but wait, wasn't that in <a href="http://strategywiki.org/wiki/Sid_Meier%27s_Alpha_Centauri/Special_Ability#Heavy_Artillery">Alpha Centauri</a> a decade ago?) -- no one seems to be covering the drastic change apparent in the screenshots. That's right -- the map uses hexagons instead of squares! What is this, some <a href="http://www.boardgamegeek.com/wiki/page/Avalon_Hill_Company_Index%2C_1952-1980">Avalon Hill</a> monstrosity? Sid Meier must be <a href="https://www.themarysue.com/power-grid/30+Great+Gaming+Geeks/Sid+Meier/">rolling in his #9 Power Grid slot</a>.

Feb 18, 2010

Freeware of the Day: Pretty Much Every Classic Command & Conquer Game

<a rel="attachment wp-att-5513" href="https://www.themarysue.com/?attachment_id=5513"></a><a rel="attachment wp-att-5513" href="https://www.themarysue.com/https://www.themarysue.com/free-command-conquer/"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-5513" title="redalert_03" src="https://www.themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/redalert_03-550x412.jpg" alt="" width="550" height="412" /></a> Geekosystem will periodically tip its readers off to classic commercial games that are now available for free! In today's installment: EA releases decade-old classics Command & Conquer, Command & Conquer: Red Alert, and Command & Conquer: Tiberian Dawn from the depths of its vast IP vault. So! Command and Conquer 4: Tiberian Twilight is being released soon, and EA is releasing the original three games in the series in an attempt to whip fans into a frenzy. (Although I, personally, have never met a Command & Conquer fan, or seen reliable indications of an online metafictional following! Please do not send us Tanya slashfiction, either. That is most unwelcome.)

Feb 16, 2010

So, Here is a 4chan-type Guy Rapping About Mass Effect 2

<a rel="attachment wp-att-5464" href="https://www.themarysue.com/mass-effect-rap-remix-mining-mineral"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-5464" title="kabutomasseffect" src="https://www.themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/kabutomasseffect-550x382.jpg" alt="" width="550" height="382" /></a> Well, this was inevitable. The <a href="http://bulk.destructoid.com/ul/user/5/56151-162385-1904927478606626855086626837813356424960njpg-620x.jpg">abysmal tedium</a> of Mass Effect 2's mining segments has been well-known<a href="http://g4tv.com/games/xbox-360/50298/mass-effect-2/review/"> since initial reviews of the game came out</a>; however, the minigame has now inspired minor nerdcore sensation <a href="http://www.myspace.com/kabutorap">Kabuto the Python</a> (above) to pen a rap about his frustration with BioWare's design choices. Sample lyrics: "I used to rock microphones, rhymin' in the stadium/These days I launch probes, mining for palladium/Slouched at my console crying from the tedium/I contemplate relations with the slimiest of aliens." Video below: technically NSFW, but if your boss doesn't care about your listening to tracks about Mass Effect at work, we don't think the obscenities per se are going to be an issue.

Feb 16, 2010

Ten Edible Board Games

<a rel="attachment wp-att-4846" href="https://www.themarysue.com/?attachment_id=4846"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4846" title="dice" src="https://www.themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/dice.jpg" alt="" width="500" height="338" /></a>We thought you'd never ask! For some reason, the rectangular shapes and smooth detailing of hobby board games -- especially those slightly abstract yet adorably representative Eurogames -- makes gamers long for the sweet, sweet taste of cake.<a href="http://orange.half-life2.com/portal.html"> Delicious cake.</a> And sometimes, those gamers happen to actually be good at baking! And to produce edible versions of the board games that, while not so arcane and complex as to be unplayable, are still obscure enough that playing them doesn't evoke memories of family Monopoly sessions. So! Behold! Ten board games, presented in cake form!

Feb 13, 2010

Thumbnail Gallery of Horrors: The Best of the Worst of Chatroulette

<img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-4660" title="Screen shot 2010-02-12 at 10.19.38 AM" src="https://www.themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Screen-shot-2010-02-12-at-10.19.38-AM-220x185.png" alt="" width="220" height="185" /><a href="http://chatroulette.com/">Chatroulette</a>'s rise through the various layers of Internet culture has been illustrative -- illustrative, that is, of how online phenomena bubble up first in the strangest and most arcane of places before finally dribbling down to the "mainstream" outlets that make up the sprawling majority of media. From the horrific cultural smelters of 4chan and SomethingAwful, out through the sprawling network of topical forums, and finally, onto sites like BlackBook, Buzzfeed, and NYMag, the site -- which, in case you've been speedrunning Dragon Age or something, randomly connects users through their webcams -- has evolved to the verge of Internet behemoth-dom. Ah, Chatroulette -- now that you're about to go mainstream, let us savor the last lingering moments of your cultural relevance, before your meme-riddled concupiscence goes the way of all flesh. And what better way to do that than with a gallery of The Best of the Worst of Chatroulette!

Feb 12, 2010

Adult Swim Now Airing Andy Dick Machinima as “News Segment”

<a rel="attachment wp-att-4525" href="https://www.themarysue.com/adult-swim-news-apple-daily-chinese"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4525" title="aswimdick1" src="https://www.themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/aswimdick1-550x408.jpg" alt="" width="550" height="408" /></a>Remember Apple Daily, the Taiwanese tabloid that produces CGI videos depicting the events of major Western news stories? And how <a href="http://www.mediaite.com/online/tiger-woods-machinima-edition/">their segment on the Tiger Woods scandal started a mini-empire of Internet virality</a>? Adult Swim is now airing the videos as "Adult Swim News" segments. Can a show composed entirely of "viral" "internet" "vids" be far behind? (That is, one that isn't on G4?)

Feb 11, 2010

Killer Whale Fights Great White Shark, Wins, Devours Shark’s Corpse

<a rel="attachment wp-att-4190" href="https://www.themarysue.com/whale-vs-shark-whale-fights-shark/whaleshark/"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4190" title="whaleshark" src="https://www.themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/whaleshark-550x151.jpg" alt="" width="550" height="151" /></a>The already-rich Internet video trove of huge awesome animals fighting other huge awesome animals just got a bit richer: the Discovery Channel is currently re-airing an entire documentary on one epic Whale vs. Shark battle. Shades of <a href="http://www.theasylum.cc/product.php?id=155">Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus</a>? What's even better is the grisly aftermath in which the whales...devour the corpse of their victim. Oh. Oh my god.

Feb 9, 2010

A Pocket Guide to Fictional Social Networks

<a rel="attachment wp-att-3350" href="https://www.themarysue.com/fake-social-networks/faceunion/"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-3350" title="faceunion" src="https://www.themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/faceunion-550x358.jpg" alt="" width="550" height="358" /></a> Yesterday, we wrote about <a href="https://www.themarysue.com/truelore-fictional-social-network/">an entire social network dedicated to fictional personas</a>, which made us think: what are some social networks that, while aimed at real human beings, are themselves totally made up to fill a void in pop culture? Join us below for a Campbellian hero's journey into the world of what TV writers, popular authors, and late-night comics think about when they think about social networking!

Feb 5, 2010

This Exists: TrueLore, The Social Network For Sad, Sad Fictional Personas

<a rel="attachment wp-att-3017" href="https://www.themarysue.com/truelore-fictional-social-network"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-3017" title="bnynt" src="https://www.themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/bnynt.jpg" alt="" width="231" height="284" /></a>The whole "niche social network" thing has really got to stop. Yes, every group has particular needs in terms of social tools and interface. Yes, the only way to go up against heavy hitter like Facebook and LinkedIn is to <a href="http://cdixon.org/2009/08/25/six-strategies-for-overcoming-chicken-and-egg-problems/">exploit irregular network topologies</a> and cater to close-knit groups of online weirdos.But still: A social network dedicated entirely to fictional personas? Surely this is nothing less than a Pynchonesque exercise in exploring the concept of digital-aether-as-liminal-space? Nope, it's a bunch of grown-up Hot Topic kids who think they're werewolves. Thanks, Internet! Below, let's take a stroll through the gallery of horrors:

Feb 4, 2010

Andrew Cedotal - Page 2